Dear Readers,
Have you ever felt like you were being pushed, pulled, and
maybe even shoved in every direction imaginable and felt as though you were
simply going to just snap? Break? Fall completely apart? Lately, I’ve been feeling a lot like this,
especially in my M-F daily work place. I’ve also had a lot of ‘other’ things
swimming in my head, causing me to completely lose focus on the thankfulness
goals I set for myself. I've forgotten what I enjoy doing FOR ME. I've forgotten what it is that makes my soul happy. Let’s explore just a little more, if you will.
Let’s face it. Jobs are stressful. I know people often say, ‘Find
something you love doing and you won’t work a day in your life.’ While I am all
about that idea, I also know that as much as I love my job and the wee ones I
work with, many days as of late, my job stresses me out and it feels exactly like WORK. In my line of work
(Special Education), I have multiple people pushing, pulling, and even shoving
me in all different directions. I am at the mercy of the organization I work
for, the school districts we service, the families of the children, and my own
desire to be the best I can be. I seem to
always have deadlines that must be met, changes to embrace, new methods to
practice. I am sure you can all relate to this, regardless of the field you work in.
Add to the stress of work, we can all agree that we have
personal stressors to deal with on a daily basis as well. Family requires our attention, bills require
paying, and friends often require our help in one way or another. Being the type of person we are, we do everything in our power to help others before we do things for ourselves. We become so overwhelmed with the many
different directions we are being tugged in, that we become all consumed by the
stress and fail to recognize the little things that make life worth living! We stop Thinking Thankfully and allow the stress and negativity to take over.
Lately, I’ve felt as though I have had no real ‘me time’.
Sure I like to go every two weeks to get my nails done. It’s a little bit of a
pampering session JUST FOR ME. But that’s only every two weeks. My youngest daughter plays Varsity Basketball
for the local high school. From November until now, my life becomes consumed
with all things Basketball Mom related. I love it. But it really takes over my
life and things I enjoy are put on a bit of a back burner. Yet another
direction I’m being pushed, pulled, and shoved in. As I mentioned in the previous blog posting,
lately I haven't been able to find time to just sit and write. Writing is my
favorite method of expressing who I am. I have always enjoyed writing and have
always held out the hopes that ONE DAY, one sweet day; I WILL BE a published
author. I dream of being a bestselling author.
I dream a happy dream, but in the end, when the reality of the idea hits
and I am forced to realize that this will probably, most definitely NEVER
happen to me, I find myself wallowing in a bit of self pity, wondering why I even write in the first place. And that is no
good for anyone. A happy life depends on us and no one else. We have to make
the time to make ourselves happy before we can do for others and make them
happy. We have to remember what makes our soul happy and then go out and do it, without worrying about anything else! Happiness has to begin with US. I enjoy writing for ME and whether or not I become someone well known because of it shouldn't matter in the end.
I guess I’ve realized that we must find that which compels our
spirit and then just do it; much like writing for me. I’ve got to make the
time, sit down UNINTERRUPTED, and write. Whatever flows out of me, whatever
innermost whispers are struggling to be heard, I must make the time and write. I must bring a loud voice to my whispers.
Until next time…..
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