Hello, my friends, Hello!!!

 

Well, hello there my old friends. It has been such a long time since I felt like sitting down and writing. (and after I published this, I saw that is has been 1 year since I've blogged. Last blog posted April 22, 2022 - eeeek) So, what's new with me, you ask?

WELL!!!!

We are now on Instagram!!! (@thinkthankfully)  I will try my best to keep that updated on a more regular basis. We are still on Facebook, but that has not been a social media platform of choice for me, so I've kind of let that slide a bit. Maybe I'll get back into that again, someday.

I'm also working on a book! Yes, you read that right! A book! Not necessarily a thankful book but a book I'm super thankful for!!! It should be hitting Amazon Kindle in the next few weeks. I'm hoping to publish a chapter a week as an episode book!

I've started a new job that has taken me out of the classroom and into a quasi-administrative role in a local school district. I'm still within the teacher's contract (hence the quasi), but hoping that after additional certification on my part, it might turn into something a bit bigger. I love where I work, who I work with, what I'm doing, and all that jazz!!!

I had Achilles Repair surgery in June 2022. With that came about a whole host of learning experiences. It was tough being non-weight bearing for the entire summer, but thankfully, it is healing well (could take up to a year and a half to feel 100% better).

I did find these shoes on Amazon, that I absolutely LOVE. I have them in every color! They feel good on my heel, and still offer a stylish look (not an old granny look) for my daily work wear. They look good with jeans, too!!! Cheap, well made, and snazzy!!! Grab a pair or two and thank me later!!! (I sized up a half size because of the heel issue, but they fit well, so there's that, too)

(As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases)

For your morning, boost, try this coffee! We love it!

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Until next time!

Boy did I mess up!

 

I host a YouTube channel (Aunt Ally's Storytime) where I upload videos of me reading stories mainly for my nephew and niece, but it has garnished some other interest and a few more children seem to enjoy the weekly storytime with "Aunt Ally".

As I scrolled through Amazon to purchase more books to read, I came across one that had a strange familiarity to me. Tikki Tikki Tembo. As soon as I saw the title, I immediately began to sing: "Tikki Tikki Tembo-no Sa Rembo-chari Bari Ruchi-pip Peri Pembo". It is a catchy rhyming phrase that has a sing songy sound to it. So, I bought the book.

It arrived yesterday. I read it. I was embarrassed that I was so ignorant about the story. To be entirely honest, I couldn't remember the story and I still do not remember WHY that phrase is so sing songy in my head, but after reading the story, I decided I will NOT be using it in a weekly story telling session.

The book is touted as a Chinese folktale, but as I read the story, I quickly realized that the story seems to give off a rather stereotyped, negative impression of the Chinese culture and moreso, the family unit. I did some researching of some things presented in the 'folktale' and found them to be completely false and THAT made me sad. And while I don't think the author of the book, Arlene Mosel, meant for her story to be offensive, I just couldn't, in good conscience, use that children's book on my storytime.

Reading the story reminded me of an in-service training that we had to do about cultural sensitivity. Things that we grew up saying, things that seemed absolutely harmless in spoken words, were in fact, offensive phrases to some cultural groups. There was a lot of backlash to that in-service.

 

"We've ALWAYS said that."

"My goodness people need to lighten up."

"Watch me stop saying that just because some snowflakes were offended." (yup - that was really said.).

It stuck with me hearing people say these things. And while I, too, questioned how some of the things were offensive, once explained I could understand. When you grow up in a more privileged culture, there is no way you can totally understand the offensiveness of things to other cultures and in NO WAY should you be diminishing their being offended. With an open mind, you CAN begin to understand their point of view, their feelings.

I messed up. I took a sing songy phrase that I remember from somewhere in my childhood and thought nothing of it. It never even phased me that it MIGHT be derogatory in nature. I ordered the book and eagerly awaited its arrival, planning to use it next week on my channel. I failed to look it up more before diving in.

There is nothing wrong with admitting a mistake, admitting you've messed up. While there was no harm done with my mess up, but there could have been. If you believe you can never be wrong, you’re actually wrong - very wrong. We all make mistakes, and it’s okay. In fact, that’s what makes us human.

 

Until next time......Think Thankfully

 

Monday Musings

 

The thoughts that are rambling through my mind this Monday: 

Monday Musings

This morning was truly a Monday in the most Mondayest sense of the word! My hair just didn't end up the way I wanted them to, I forgot my tea in the garage after I set it down to put my school bag in my car, I realized I left my garage door open all weekend (after putting my car in it on Saturday), and my mind just feels like it is in a fog today. I'm attributing that to the fact that I started a new medication last week and yesterday was the first day of taking it twice a day. I was warned that this could be an effect of the meds until my body adjusts. It's not terrible, it's just different for me.

All that aside, I've decided to start working this blog again. I'm going to attempt to write more! I miss it. Writing has always been something I've enjoyed doing. It's always been easier to put my words down on paper (or a screen) rather than speak them. I guess I always thought that if I write what I'm thinking or feeling, I can hand those words off and walk away, not having to deal with the fallout, whatever it may be. If I say them to someone, I'm right there to read their faces or have to deal with whatever they do/say after hearing me. I don't like confrontation. I'm a people pleaser. I don't like being in uncomfortable situations. A lot of time, speaking to people leads to those uncomfortable situations. Writing. That's the ticket for me.

My dream (since I was in high school many moons ago), has been to write a novel. I was in a creative writing class in high school and I penned a wonderful teenage novella. I worked so hard on it, ON A TYPEWRITER, many evenings at my grandmother's house. It was such a good story! BUT.....there was a fire at my parents' house and it got tossed in the clean up. I remember the title, The Brightest Star. I was so proud of that little novella. I've been thinking about it a lot lately. Perhaps that is the nudge I need in order to start penning something again.

In addition to some other medical diagnoses I've recently been given (nothing too Earth shattering), I diagnosed myself with atychiphobia - the fear of failure. I think this is why I never see any writing through to completion. I fear no one will read it. I fear no one will like it. I fear failure. I do know that failure propels you to success. So, that being said, I'm going to start small - blogging again - and then I will start framing out the ideas I have for a novel. Or maybe a children's book! Or....who knows!!! I just know I really want to write.

Mondays are a good day to refocus and set our intentions for the week, for a specific thing, for anything!!! Today, I'm setting my intention to get back in the writing game.

Until next time.....

Thankfulness 2020

 A different thankful post tonight.....

NYE 2020. Last year we were preparing to head out to eat with friends and then ring in the new year playing games and enjoying the company of those friends. Tonight, we’ve got on our finest jammies and will bring in 2021 from the comfort of our recliners, just the two of us, because, well, 2020. 

I challenged myself on January 1 to complete one full year of Daily Calm Mindfulness practices in my Calm App. I was blessed many years ago, to be given a lifetime membership to Calm because I was a teacher and part of the Calm Classroom Initiative. I started my day, every day of 2020, with the mindfulness practice of The Daily Calm. How little I knew at the time, that this simple little practice of daily mindfulness would truly change my life. 

I’ve learned to stop stressing over things I have zero control over. I learned that if I can’t change things, I can change how I react to them. I learned that even the best of intentions can have disastrous outcomes. I’ve learned that I control what happens in MY life. I’ve learned that simply taking time for me, usually 10-12 minutes a day, and practicing mindfulness can change your whole life. I’ve learned that I’m completely happy in my quiet life, keeping my circle small, and not worrying so much about others’ lives. 

I’ve learned that social media is complete shit and that people will make themselves look far better here than they are in reality and that everyone is an expert on nothing. I’ve learned that once a habit is formed, it’s hard to break. I’ve learned that my thankful posts are posted, and will continue, as much for others as for myself. 

And despite the year forever known as the shitshow of 2020, it wasn’t horrible for me. I learned to cook. I learned I have all I need within the walls of my home. I learned I can be happy in my solitude. I learned self reliance. My relationship with my husband grew even tighter, if that’s even possible. My relationship with my true sister friends became more solid, as we helped each other through this year. My fortitude became stronger as I did my part to keep COVID away from my household. 

2020 taught me a lot. I do not look at the last 365 days as a bad year, personally. Hell, anything is better than 2019 was for me. Sure we suffered loss, again, but we also strengthened family bonds, and for that I will forever be thankful to 2020. 

When you are thankful for all you have, you have all you really need. 

I wish you a 2021 filled with your own awakenings, transformations, enlightenment, and love.....always love. ❤️

And tonight, THAT is what I am thankful for.

Stay safe. Stay healthy. STAY HOME!

It's been a while since I last blogged. Honestly, the creative juices have not been flowing so freely this last month or so. Considering the state of the world right now, I felt as though writing might be something that would help my current state of mind. 

My routine has been shaken up as a result of COVID-19, much like a lot of you I would assume. Being in a state of limbo with regards to what work is going to look like, whether those I love are taking this seriously and staying safe, how long is this going to last.....among a lot of other thoughts racing through my head....this all really stinks. But one thing I know for sure is that together we will get through all this as long as we stay safe, stay healthy, and STAY HOME!

I decided to take a break from Facebook for the Lenten season. I still post my nightly thankful posts (and thank GOD I do, because that is helping to keep me sane throughout all of this - I haven't left my house except to walk the dogs around town once or twice a day) and I occasionally post from Instagram (mainly for birthdays I feel need recognition - parents, nieces, etc). I haven't truly scrolled through Facebook in a long period of time. I'm learning how freeing it is to NOT be so reliant on social media and the misinformation that spreads rampant on those platforms. Reflecting on my time away (isn't that what Lent is all about - reflection?), I am not so sure I will ever go back to the Facebook activity that I once had.

This time in our lives is definitely a challenging one. No one truly knows what to expect and the unknowns are quite scary (at least I think they are). I'm a bit of a loner, truth be told. I'm ok being here in my house with just my dogs and my husband, but I do miss being with my extended family. I miss the occasional interaction with acquaintances I'd see at the grocery store or post office. I miss seeing my work friends. I miss my best friend. I do miss life as I knew it prior to COVID-19 coming around. I'm sure we all do.

I can't tell you what to do. I can't tell you how to feel. But I can ask you to stay safe, stay healthy, and STAY HOME.  For your sake and for mine....STAY HOME.

 

Life has a way of showing us that we are not in control

Life has a way of showing us that we are NOT in control. Not even close. Just when we think we are climbing our way out of dark places, something happens that reminds us to not get too comfortable with life as we think it should go. You know, John Lennon said it best in the song Beautiful Boy, "Life is what happens to you when you are busy making other plans." a phrase he borrowed from Allen Saunders in a Reader's Digest article penned in January 1957. Life has a way of showing us that we are NOT in control. Yesterday, I randomly wrote the word GRIEF on a blank piece of notebook paper. Just one word. That word. Grief.

It seems as though this grief I've been experiencing is not going anywhere anytime soon. I've been doing a lot of reading on the topic of grief. One thing I've come to understand is that where there was the loss of someone significant, as long as that person remains significant in our lives, though no longer here, that grief remains. I attribute that to the reason I've never really 'gotten over' the loss of my grandmother. Losing Billy kicked my grief into hyperdrive. I'm almost absolutely certain that I will live with my grief for the rest of my life. 

Life has a way of showing us that we are NOT in control. Not even close. Just when we think we are climbing our way out of dark places, something happens that reminds us to not get too comfortable with life as we think it should go. Yesterday, I received word that a 22 year old young lady, one I've known for the better part of 10 plus years - as a friend of my youngest daughter AND as a player on the basketball team I was the assistant coach for - was in the midst of a major medical situation, one that has her fighting for her life. Receiving that news sent my emotions into a tailspin. The grief I've been feeling found it's way right back to the forefront of my head and heart. Grief, I've found, is a lot like waves in an ocean. Sometimes that grief comes in little skipper waves, the ones that just ripple up on the shore, unassumingly. Sometimes that grief comes in crashing waves, the ones that hit you hard, knocking you down and tossing you around the surf like a ragdoll. I'm learning how to manage each wave that comes my way.

Today, I'm feeling a different grief. It's a grief for the family of my dear sweet Mady. My heart truly aches for them right now, and in a weird way, it is taking all the focus off of my own, personal heartache and grief. For the past 24+ hours, I've not focused on the fact that yesterday was Tuesday and my grief surfaces hard on Tuesdays. Yesterday, my grief wasn't my own. It was a grief focused on Mady and the entire Bush family. I know my own grief is there. I remember my loss(es) all too well. It will NEVER go away, but in this instance, I have been able to channel it a bit.

I've rallied my Prayer Warriors, my friends on Facebook who always answer my rally cry for prayers without hesitation. There is an army of people praying hard for Mady Bush right now. If ever there was a need for a miracle, now is it.

I believe in miracles....and I am praying hard for one right now. If you feel so inclined, please pray for one, too.

An all day every day love affair

It's the month of LOVE. February is always associated with red, hearts, love, Valentines, romance. February is my second favorite month of the year (next to November, of course - shout out to my beautiful November-born daughters).

Let's talk love. Love is a beautiful thing and I am so truly blessed to have pure and true love in my life on a daily basis. I'm not a huge proponent of Valentine's Day, but I love LOVE. I do not believe I need a special day to be showered with love and romantic gestures, mostly because I get that every single day. Read that again.....I do not believe I need a special day to be showered with love and romantic gestures, mostly because I get that every single day. I am truly blessed and I realize not everyone can say that. Before my husband entered my life, I could not say that. My first marriage was a hot mess of mental and emotional abuse. I was never truly shown what love looked like in a marriage. That all changed when Bill entered my life.

This past Christmas, Bill and I were married 10 years. Most people say that love starts to fade a bit with time. I am here to tell you, in the right relationship that does NOT have to be the case. I am still just as in love with and attracted to my husband as I was the first time I laid eyes on him. It still excites me that I am the one who is lucky enough to fall asleep next to him and wake up with him by my side every single night/day. The excitement of coming home from work to see him is still strong, the giddy feeling of him letting me know he's on his way home from work at the end of the day is still as strong as it was in the beginning. I look forward to my morning text messages each and every day. If there is such a thing as a honeymoon stage in a relationship, ours is nowhere near being over! 

I do not believe I need a special day to be showered with love and romantic gestures, mostly because I get that every single day. I remember back when things were fresh and new, telling Bill that I hoped we would never get to a point where saying I love you was just something that was automatic and said because it felt like it should be. I never wanted to get to a point where we felt as though we had to express love towards one another, because it was expected of us. All these years later, nothing has changed. Expressing love towards one another is so natural, so easy. It's one of the easiest things to do, love my husband. We truly have an all day every day love affair, and it is exciting, wonderful, intense, romantic.

My wish for whomever is reading this, is that YOU have a love like this in your life, that you are able to experience such an incredible love at some point, if you don't already. I realize I am blessed and that what I have is extremely special to be able to say I have Valentine's Day EVERY SINGLE DAY in my life. I wish you a forever love....the kind of love that gives YOU an all day every day love affair!

Happy Valentine's Day!